Sunday, January 30, 2011

Our day is coming

We had an ultrasound with Dr. H this morning to see how my body is doing with the FSH injections this cycle. We finally got some good news. We have one follicle that is right on target and one that is just a little bit smaller than it needs to be but in Dr. H's words "that's perfect". We found out if we had more than 3 follicles that we would have to cancel this cycle- we didn't want to do that...again!
J.D. and I were smiling from ear to ear when we walked out of Dr. H's office this morning. We have two more days of injections and then at 3 PM on Wednesday we will be in Dr. H's office for the IUI. Since the IUI is at 3 PM (my request) we have to get up at 3 AM on Tuesday morning to do the HCG injection.
Please keep us in your prayers as we approach Wednesday and more importantly the few weeks following...hoping for a positive test. I asked Dr. H if accupuncture would be beneficial in this process. He said that it may help for relaxation benefits and possibly blood flow (although there is no concrete evidence that is the case) but massage would be just a good for relaxation...soooo J.D. told me I can get a massage this week before the procedure...yippee! The good news is I got a gift certificate to the spa for Christmas so now I have a really good reason to use it.

Until next time...

Monday, January 24, 2011

My J.D.

Self portrait at Grandma Sullivan's "90th" Birthday party

With our two youngest nephews during what I call "Sullivan Family Fun weekend" 2010

If was to give advice to any girl looking for a husband I would tell her to find someone like my J.D. He is a man with the kindest heart and forgiving and understanding spirit and a big softy with his wife (except when I need to be called on something I shouldn't be doing- which I appreciate) and my rock when life is tough.
This past weekend had been a rough and tough one. I have mostly been myself but also feel like I have been walking around in a haze that I can't shake. If I would think too much about grandma and the memories I have that involve her and I would start to cry- this wonderful husband of mine is always right there holding my hand and my heart exactly when I needed it. He lets me have my space to mourn the lost of grandma and burst out in anger/frustration (because sometimes that is what works best for me) and gently tells me everything is going to be ok. He prays for my comfort to get through this week and for success in all that I do.
I told him on Saturday that I wanted to buy a new dress for grandma's funeral and he didn't object for one second, in fact, he encouraged me to. He reminded me that I haven't bought a new dress since I bought my wedding dress- two years ago. What woman wouldn't love that kind of support and encouragement!
He is a softy but he is a tough guy too. We start FSH injections tomorrow and he is going to be brave and give me the shots. I told him I was sure I could find a nurse at work that would do it for me if he didn't want to but he is going to man up and do it...what a great guy. His wife the future nurse gets nervous about giving a shot to herself.
I am so blessed- beyond measure! I always day dreamed about what my life would be like when I was married and this is so much better than I imagined. I am so grateful for the rock in my life that is my husband.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

In Memory of Lois Ann Maloney Sullivan- My gramma

Grandma at her "90th" birthday party-
She kept telling us she was 90 even though she was only turning 88.

Grandma and her grand kids (except Jared) at her "90th" birthday party

Grandma and her kids- Frank w/ Lisa (L) and Kathy w/ David (R)
Grandma and her great grandchildren

My grandma passed away this morning, January 22, 2011. She was 88 years old, an amazing woman and leaves so many good memories for me to help remember her.
I have cried as I have been thinking about her this morning. I am not crying because I am sad, she was ready to go and because I knew she was ready I was able to say good bye and not be sad (mostly). I am so grateful at times like this that I know about the plan of salvation- this isn't the end but more of a pause for a short time- in the grand scheme of things. I am at peace because I know she is with her husband again and it kind of makes me chuckle inside (more than a little) when I think if she followed through on her threat of punching grandpa in the nose when she saw him again or if she really gave him a big hug- I'm going to go with the hug simply because I know this wonderful woman and how much she missed her sweetheart.
My grandma was a wonderful woman who I had the pleasure to spend a lot of time with during my growing up years. I was lucky enough to live just down the road from she and my grandpa for as long as I remember. She was one of my best friends and I always knew I could count on her when it felt like I couldn't count on anyone else. She taught me how to cook and how to take care of a husband. She always made sure to bring home a treat for grandpa when she went to town- that could mean strawberries (his favorite), a candy bar or a bag of chips. She taught me to be hospitable to everyone that came to my home. One of the things that she talked about often in the past few years was how much she missed being able to cook for people and she was so happy that everyone knew they would have a good meal if they came to the Sullivan Ranch.
My grandma taught me that being religious and going to church are not mutually exclusive. One of the important first lessons I learned from her growing up in a small community where religion was a dividing line. I loved sitting and talking at the kitchen table with her.
My cousin, Andy summarized perfectly the feelings I have had the past few days as I have been thinking of the life my grandma led and the legacy she leaves behind...
Sadness coupled with a sense of peace. She lived a long, meaningful life. A lucky and grieving (granddaughter), grateful I had the chance to be taken care of, learn from and enjoy the company of such a lovely lady.
My grandma, Lois Ann Maloney Sullivan with be forever in my heart and forever in my memory.

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

A Simple Phone call

I have been struggling with the nurse practitioner at Dr. H's office that I have been assigned to. I don't know if she is new at her job or just a complete bobble head but she has missed the mark with every appointment. From not returning urgent calls when I was having a strange reaction to medication to not giving me correct dosing information during our next cycle that we are about to start. During a couple of appointments I had to tell her the same information several times. I started wondering if this was all my imagination until I talked to J.D. about it and he confirmed that he was surprised how many times she asked me the same questions during the appointments he has gone to with me. I finally hit my breaking point today after I got an email response from her asking for clarification on injection amounts for this cycle. The information she had given me over the phone was different by a significant amount than what her email stated. When I asked for clarification her response was "I'm glad we could accommodate your desire to do injections this cycle but all of the confusion would have been avoided if you would have had a consult with the doctor."
I had never up to this point been told I needed to have a special injection consult with the doctor. I am more than happy to jump through the hoops for this but this is new information to me. Anyway, I was shocked by her response and quite frankly was ready to throw my hands in the air and just find a new doctor.
My wonderful husband told me that he thought it best to just call them and explain what was going on request that we work with a different nurse practitioner or at least not have to work with this one. Well I made the call and talked to the receptionist first who is always very helpful. She connected me with the nurse manager, Heather. This wonderful nurse/woman put me at ease. She told me a consult wasn't necessary and apologized that our experience had been so rough up to this point. She was so kind to go over everything with me again to make sure that I understood what I needed and even sent me an email with her direct contact information so if I have any other questions or concerns after this. I can't express adequately what a weight was lifted off my shoulders after talking to her. That simple phone call solved in 10 minutes something that has been bothering me for 3 months.
I am so grateful for a wise husband and his counsel and the understanding of a nurse that really gets it. Amazing what a simple phone call can do!

Monday, January 10, 2011

Christmas and New Year

We had a wonderful Christmas in Idaho with the Sullivan family this year. We were able to spend 4 days just relaxing and enjoying the beauty of Idaho, not to mention Dad and Lisa's new house near Salmon. I have pictures of some of the festivities but they are on my camera and I can't find the contraption I use to download to my computer. They will likely be on facebook before they are here. We nearly had another fire again this year on Christmas day. Dad bought a prime rib to eat for dinner and wanted to cook it on the BBQ grill. Well if you know anything about prime rib you know there is A LOT of fat on them (gives the meat its wonderful flavor) well gas flames and beef fat are not a good combination and it took awhile to get everything set up so there wasn't a constant fire in the grill. The twine that the butcher used to tie the ribs to the roast part of the prime rib burned off quickly with all of that fire so being the genius family we are used wire to hold the meat together so it could still cook on the grill...can you say Griswold??!! When it was all said and done the prime rib was so good and perfectly cooked. I really wish we would have been recording the time it took to get it all set up.

I worked both New Years Eve day and New Years Day. J.D. and I don't stay up to ring in the New Year but we did make sure to have donuts in the house like grandma Sullivan always told us to do so we can have prosperity in the new year. We attempted to go out to dinner at Texas Roadhouse on New Year's Eve because I was canceled at work early but everyone else decided to go to dinner early too it appeared because when we showed up at 5 pm it was at least an hour wait to be seated. We ended up going to a Mi Ranchito for dinner and celebrated by having some friend ice cream for dessert. YUMMY!

I have been thinking for the past several weeks about New Year resolutions. I've never been the type that writes down these things that I feel like I need to work on or improve. This year I have a few things in mind...

- Read scriptures daily- at tithing settlement our bishop challenged us to read from the Book of Mormon everyday during 2011. He even put together a reading schedule and gave it to us.

- Follow the budget- I am the WORST at this. I am so lucky to be married to such a patient man that leads by example. We are blessed to both have jobs that provide well for us but who doesn't want to find an extra couple hundred in the budget each month. My solution is to quit being so selfish and start taking lunch to work and school with me rather than thinking I need to and can afford to buy lunch everyday. J.D. will go out with friends maybe twice a month for lunch and I am striving to do the same. We have also decided that we are going to limit how often we go out to dinner. Something I read on another blog last week was about the couple splitting a meal- not a bad idea since we are both trying to eat better and smaller portions and don't like to take home leftovers from a restaurant.

- Prepare myself for a baby. This is obviously an ongoing process for us right now. I need to take better care of my body and listen to the things the doctors tell me to do ALL the time not just when I feel like it. I have to admit I have been better about taking the thyroid medication I have been prescribed, now I just need to work on consistency with the metformin (for insulin resistance) and get some form of exercise in each day. However, I don't just need to prepare myself physically but mentally to have a baby. I don't think it is a surprise to anyone that I adore my nephews. They are 5 of the cutest boys on the planet but it is so true that I get to send them home at the end of the day.

-Study and focus- school is starting and I am applying to the LPN program at DATC in Layton to start in August. I need to be on my "A" game this semester. I am excited for the classes I'm taking- Anatomy, Physiology and Intro to Music. I am told that it typically takes three applications to get into the program but I'm crossing my fingers and toes that it doesn't take that long for me to get in. I have also been told that you get extra points the older you are...FINALLY it pays off to be an older student in college. I am excited about this program because once I'm done with the LPN program I can go right into the RN program at Weber State and be done in 18 months. I love having a light at the end of the tunnel.